How to improve children and young people's confidence

We always hear people talk about the importance of having good confidence, but what does it mean and how does having confidence help children and young people to thrive?

What is confidence

‘Confidence’ is defined as ‘a feeling or belief that you can do something well or succeed at something'. There are many different actions or attributes that can indicate your child has a good level of confidence. 

Indications your child has a good level of confidence might be: 

• Independent decision making
• Risk-taking
• Enjoying taking responsibility
• Reaching their developmental milestones
• Setting out things they want to achieve
• Showing resilience 
• Looking out for and helping others
• Avoiding attention seeking 

These are just a few attributes that may indicate that a child or young person has good confidence. Just like each cloud in the sky though, each child is unique so your child might display this in another form. Let’s look more at why it is important for our children to have confidence even if the way they express it might lead to us taking a few deep breaths in succession.

Benefits of confidence in childhood

Confidence is the propulsion that leads to achievement. It has been shown that children with high levels of confidence achieve better grades, grow in self-esteem and are more able to learn from mistakes rather than be deterred by them. As so much of our children’s lives are centered around learning; it makes sense that what promotes learning is important. We all would love our children to achieve more and have all the options in the world for their future. Confidence can help them get there and then give them the capability to make the right decision for them. 

A study by the University of Washington, for example, shows that at the age of 5, children already have a sense of self-esteem and that this then seems to remain stable for the duration of their lives. It has been found to play a critical role in the development of their social identity. Put simply, confidence instilled young is likely to remain in place long-term. As an adult, confidence is very important whether you are going for a job interview or travelling the world, sorting out conflict or doing public speaking. As this is developed as a child; thus confidence and instilling it in our children is important.

It is however important to note that whilst we want to ensure our children have all they need to reach for the stars and achieve great things, not all children will achieve this in the same way and this might be different to what you might want for your child. Not every child will be a scientist or doctor, but every child needs confidence to succeed in the goals they themselves want to reach.

How to help improve children's confidence

Children observe first and do second, so look to set an example. If they see you tackling new tasks with optimism, acknowledging worries but not being phased by them and not shy or upset about making mistakes then this is likely to help instil the tools they need to grow in confidence. They will learn that it is OK to take risks because if they get it wrong then they can learn from it. They will learn just because something looks difficult or scary, it doesn’t mean they cannot accomplish it. They will also see that everyone has worries about certain things- it is normal to feel that way occasionally but pushing past this can lead to accomplishments better than anything they could imagine! 

You could go on a day out together, try building something new together, let them play an active role in prepping tea or learn a new skill like crochet together. Any learning opportunity or challenging situation can be turned into one that builds confidence. Start small. Get to know your child- their worries, their fears, their hopes and their dreams- then use this to slightly challenge them and build their confidence. 

Here at The Island building confidence in our young people is central to all that we do. From group sessions to one-to-one mentoring, the focus is on what we can do to support our young people to grow in confidence and realise their full potential. 

To learn more about the services we offer click here. Alternatively, if you want to join us a volunteer to support our young mentees to grow in confidence, click here.

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